on lent (taking up shorthand for)

you considered giving up smoking...

...but the last eight days (up to last night in the swan) seemed to prove that you're still not addicted, though the feeling that kept you awake at night, the feeling that insects were crawling beneath the flesh on your limbs, suggests that you may be worryingly close to nicotine dependence

you considered giving up drinking...

...but the last eight days (up to last night in the swan) seemed to prove that you're still in control, and that although it might still be a good puzzle to cross Dublin without passing a pub, it still seems possible, for now, to cross Dublin without stopping in one

you considered giving up drinking with those three...

...and then laughed heartily

you considered giving up drinking with college friends...

...but realised it would make too much of a dent in your social life

you considered giving up drinking on your own...

...but realised it would make too much of a dent in your social life

you considered giving up chocolate...

...but remembered you're not twelve, and since you mainly subsist on this gift (and others) from the Aztecs, abstinence on that front might well be good for the soul but could ultimately lead to a waning demise of the body

and so, after much soul-searching, you've come to a decision that could finally unhinge you more than all of the excesses you routinely inflict on your few pounds of grey matter and scarce more stones of flesh and bone

you're taking up shorthand

just a little, but a little every day

because lent is, after all, about sacrifice

and what greater sacrifice could a stubborn left-handed disciple of modern recording technology make than to learn how to doodle in a consistent and readable manner?

your penance will almost certainly lead to gross consumption of all of the above vices

but this process is about healing the soul

so body be damned, i guess

well then, tonight's the night...

a night when you face your demons, embarking on forty days and nights in which you must muster all available strength of purpose in the hope that this humble sacrifice will finally prove your worth to the fourth floor gods that forever hold the key to the cathedral gates, and salvation

wish me luck